While there are no clear-cut rules for dating, there are plenty of guidelines that can help you find what you're looking for and avoid pitfalls.
The single most important thing you should know when looking for your ideal partner is not about your partner; it's about you. If you can answer it, then you can move on to things you want in a partner and things you'd like to avoid.
First, you have to understand, not what you want from a partner, but what you want from your life. Here are some considerations to think about now that you've been dating for four months.
But most of us are shaped by our family and upbringing. Some make conscience decisions to be different -- whether or not they're able to is another story.Having a basic overview of your mate's family background can give you a window to interpret who he is.Many people are able to conceal drug and alcohol abuse for a long time -- even from people who are close to them.You should be aware if there are signs of drug and alcohol abuse or if there are any indications of possible substance abuse.Observe whether drugs and alcohol are ever used in front of you.
You should know how much and how often and what the visible effects are.Be aware of potentially indirect effects as well, like mood swings, unpredictable behavior or fatigue.It can take a year or more to emotionally process a breakup and be ready to try a new relationship.Some people simply do not move beyond the emotional injuries of old relationships and remain stuck on them indefinitely.It's not necessarily a bad thing to learn about your mate's past relationships; it may help you understand her.But, once you've learned about her, beware if she starts obsessing about past relationships.