A narcissist can’t handle the pressures of your real emotional life. They charm you with their words, but they don’t follow through with their actions. Don’t nag him or play games with him, such as making him chase you by playing hard to get.
Many narcissists are wordsmiths, saying wonderfully touching things to you.
If you express that you’re upset with something he did, he will feel rage at you, not take responsibility for his actions. A healthy relationship is one in which both parties take full responsibility for their piece in any situation. In the example of Gena above, this is what she was experiencing. He may show this through his words or his actions (disappearing). Leave this guy to make room for the one who wants a real relationship.
He’ll be really into you, telling you that you’re the most incredible woman he’s ever met, and the next day, he is pulling away, acting aloof. If you recognize it early on, it’ll be easier for you to make a cleaner break. He gets angry when you pressure him for a commitment. If you talk to him about commitment after you’ve been dating for a few months, he will probably freak out on you.
Narcissists in a relationship will give you mixed signals.
Wouldn’t it be great if it were so simple to recognize a narcissist?
I felt so attracted, like nothing I ever felt before. Sure, he was charming, and he might have swept you off your feet. Is he someone that you want to take back should he come knocking at your door again? Wouldn’t it be great if there was an easy way to figure out if the next charmer is a narcissist or a genuinely charismatic guy with relationship potential? When you’re wearing sunglasses, he’s looking at you but he’s really looking at himself reflected in your glasses. The problem lies when it’s not so black and white, when a narcissist is cleverly cloaked in a different costume, that of the ‘nice guy’, the one who says such lovely things to you.
” Simply put, you dated another narcissist, Gena; someone who cared more about his needs than yours, a guy who ran for the hills when things became too emotional, when you expected things from him.
Women often attract the same guy over and over, and it’s not always easy to recognize that he’s shown up again.
He has a hard time hearing you express what matters to you, especially if you’re addressing something he’s done to you. It is my passion to help women stop dating the toxic bad guy and make room for a wonderful, available, loving man.
If you need more help extricating yourself from a pattern of being in relationship with narcissists, whether it be at work or with a man, you can always use my contact form and ask for help.
If he still can’t make your needs important to him, he’s not a man who can build a relationship with you. You should get out of this relationship as soon as possible. And walk away, never to look back and hope for reconciliation.
He will probably shut down in order to protect his own emotions and have nothing in reserve for you. If he exhibits any of the above behaviors, you are probably dating a narcissist. These tactics will never get him to be the kind of guy with whom you can forge a healthy relationship. Tell him that this relationship is not working for YOU.