This week, the mommies find a VERY talented grandmother who works for a a certain kind of phone line, they welcome back one of the strongest performers in the adult industry, watch the trailer for Steven Seagal's new action movie where he doesn't move a lot, and much much more! Plus an incredible impromptu call with Top Dog where we read him street jokes and he laughs, well, harder than we've ever laughed at anything. This week the mommies do a very important dental update as a recent article about the merits of flossing has surfaced. T Bunz went on local TV in Cleveland and called out Crazie Locs. Also, you know what I'm saying, you feel me, understand? All in one clip from one person and he's the only one speaking. We'd like to dedicate this episode to all those days when you're feeling a little down, a little alone, a little like a d-bag that would dedicate an episode to someone. We bring the ultimate dad laugh to the table on this one. We learn about an evil sushi operation in Nor Cal and SO MUCH MORE. On this week's episode, the mommies educate themselves on vaginal knitting, get some questions answered on special people's daily schedules, pick a name for their son just incase they get pregnant again, and much, much more! Especially if you have a cold or a fever or a stomach ache or you're tired. It's your own medicine and it's free (and tastes good). Christina learns what a "trap-p***y" is during an outing at the park with her family. We thought that would have been the biggest news of this episode, but it isn't because - BRACE YOURSELF - CRAZIE LOCS finally speaks directly to us. We got that Crazie Locs jam you know you want cause this time someone ELSE made it better. Unless you are Tina jeans then you're all, "it's LA CROY." Plus we listen to what Tommy thought was Hungarian and ended up just being abusive! It rivals Top Dogs famous dad laugh, no seriously, it does.
This is the type of thing denim was built for - the ultimate Momisode. Plus there's a girl who is in to tasting the uh, splooge, of dudes from different ethnicities. Tina tries to trick Tom into playing incriminating clips of verbal "slip ups." Will it backfire on Tina? And a NEW Gnawm Sayin King is proud to take his throne. We know the show is popular but even Rachel Maddow listens! It's been a while so we gave Top Dog a call and this one not only did not disappoint - it was epic. This ep is loaded: Crazie Locs listens to a fan song, a NEW abusive pimp, La Croix responds, NEW vocal fry, and a bunch of Would You Rather's. If you're a HARD F'n CORE mommy you are in for a treat. (and it might involve a little baby named Hitler) Plus we have strictly friendly sports, a new dildo from Nick (AJ? Plus a Jamaican accent so thick the Master gets stumped?!? Whoa those are some awfully BIG WORDS you said there. Three of the most outrageous, hilarious and central people on this show are all in the episode and we had them IN studio. ) Hawk, and Doug Stanhope weighs in on the #FATBATTLE. Tommy's family is in town and the house has flipped over. An Asian guy from the South Pacific is still wanting a girlfriend, but with a new approach - intense dude energy. Plus The Water Championship has been settled, but who is the ALONE CHAMPION? The thing about having your balls shrink is ultimately, it's the best thing that can happen. Open your mouth so the whole dog can fit in the bathtub! This week we have some incredible mentions of the BIGGEST of big words. Plus a foreign accent that seems DOUBTFUL and a DENTAL UPDATE that will have you brushing extra hard tonight. A lot of you say Linked In, but you know, La Craw, La Croix, feel me? Also, note that pegging doesn't involve another dude (BERT). Let's meet contestant number 1 He's a schizophrenic serial killer clown Who says women love his sexy smile Let's find out if his charm will work on Sharon Sharon, what's your question?Contestant number 1, I believe first impressions last forever So let's say you were to come over to my parent's house And have dinner with me and my family, tell me What you'd do to make that first impression really stick Let's see, well I'd have to think about it I might show up in a tux but I doubt it I'd probably just show up naked like I always do And look your mama in the eye and tell her fuck you Hurry up bitch I'm hungry, I smell spaghetti I pinch her limpy ass and tell her get the food ready Your dad would probably start trippin' and get me pissed I'd have to walk up and bust him in his fuckin' lip It's dinner time, we're hearin' grace from your mother I'd pull a forty out and pour some for your little brother I'm steady starin' at your sister, I'll tell you this You know for only 13 she got some big tits After that, your dad would try to trip again And only this time I'd put the 40 to his chin After your mom does the dishes and the silverware I'd dry fuck her till I nut in my underwear Now let's meet contestant number 2 He's a psychopathic deranged crackhead freak Who works for the dark carnival He says women call him stretch nutz Sharon, let's hear your question I like a man who's not afraid to show his true emotion A man who expresses himself in his own special way Number 2, if you fell in love with me Exactly how would you let me know?
First thing, I could never love you You sound like richy bitch yo, fuck you But if I did, I'd probably show you that I care By takin' all these other motherfuckers outta here I'd go through your phone book and wack 'em all Then find contestant number 1 and break his fuckin' jaw (What?
) Anyone who looked at you would have to pay I'd be blowin' fuckin nuggets off all day I'd grab your titties and stretch 'em down past your waist Let 'em go and watch 'em both spring up in your face I'd sing love songs to ya the best I can, get ya naked And hit it like a cave man Then we go to the beach and walk through the sand I throw a little in your face and say I'm just playin' As you spit it all out I rub your back and grab Your underwear and wedge it up your ass crack Well, it sounds like contestant number 2 is just overflowing With sensitivity, Sharon, it's a tough choice so far Sharon, let's have your last question and see Which one is gonna win the rights to your neden Okay, if we were at a dance club and you both noticed me At the same time, tell me, how would you each Get my attention and what would your pick up line be Whoever's the smoothest wins Okay, first I'd slide up to the bar and tell you That I can't believe how fucking fat you are I'd tell you that I like the way you make your titties shake And if you lost a little weight you'd look like Rikki Lake Fuck that, you'd be jackin' me quick I'd order you a drink and stir it with my dick And then to get your attention in a crowded place I'd simply walk up and stick my nuts in your face Yeah, freak her with your nuts, yo that'll get her Tell her that she's fat, yeah that'll work even better Look, fuck you, I got a strong rap shit you don't want He's mad whack, I walked into a bar and there he was Standing on a bucket tryin' to fuck it It was a big fucking smelly ass farm llama Damn dawg, how ya gonna dis your mama?
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