If you were to ask me several years ago to give you a rundown of courtship vs dating I would have easily pulled out my notes and let it rip.But the more I read online, the more I’ve seen that (at least in Christian circles) courtship and dating mean different things to different people.
Previously this is how I would have articulated the two paradigms of pursuing romance, the courtship vs dating debate: Any spiritually minded, sincere person reading this courtship vs dating comparison would totally pick the courtship paradigm over the dating one.
But the problem comes when you face the reality that the way some people actually implement courtship has been taken to extremes, and has painted "courtship" in a fanatical light.
(Read that post here) Debra Fileta, author of True Love Dates, comments about the courtship vs dating debate in an article posted in Relevant Magazine, “The world of dating can be hard to navigate for a young Christian.
Dating in wider society is often portrayed as a feel-good experience.
If you feel “right” together, if you’re having fun, if there’s passion and pleasure, then it must be a good relationship.
But if this is the foundation of a relationship, commitment is often trumped by chemistry and loyalty is often replaced with lust.
It’s a mentality that causes us to live in the moment, rather than building a future at the same time.
It’s no wonder Christians tend to freak out about dating.
Rather than trying to navigate through the world of dating in a healthy way, it’s easier to overcompensate for one extreme by simply developing another.
So in the Christian community, models of courtship, no kissing until the altar, “God-told-me-to” break-up excuses and other confusing circumstances abound.” Our struggle as human beings is maintaining balance.
It’s common for people to swing from one side of the pendulum to the other.